02 January 2011

everything happens for a reason. or does it.

It's funny the way life works. You think you have it all figured out, and then bam!, out of nowhere, everything is turned upside down. It's been said by many, that "everything happens for a reason." But does it? Do we ever know? Is it just a positive spin people label past experiences? Is it a religious phenomenon? Don't things happen because of the choices we make? Don't our choices, rather than our abilities, dictate who we meet in life, where we travel in life, and why things do and don't happen? I've always wholeheartedly believed that things do happen for reason, but I can't help but be cynical about this mysterious concept. 

As I begin the new year, I find myself very intrigued by this concept. A few years ago, I dropped everything and moved to California to start a new life. To figure out who I am in this chaotic, whirlwind journey called life. The people I met, the places I traveled to, and the opportunities I made for myself could provide for a fascinating autobiography. (And if I ever find the time, I'd love to write an Elizabeth Gilbert-esq book on my self discoveries and experiences, if for no other person, than myself).

On the surface, I was able to reaffirm certain things I already knew about myself. Before I moved, I knew that I never had this undying passion for accounting and knew that I could never be fulfilled and happy as an accountant. But, as with everything in my life, I just had to be sure. I had to be absolutely, 110% positive that I could not love my life as a CPA. Over time, I found it more and more difficult to find happiness. Most mornings, I'd have a hard time finding the energy to drive to work. Not in the sense of, "oh man, I have to go to work today!," but, in the "Oh my dear Lord, I honestly don't think I can handle one more second of staring hopelessly at a never ending excel spreadsheet, while dialing into yet another conference call about how my client is going to apply some ridiculously overcomplicated tax law" sense. Needless to say, after 2 years and 10 months of pretending to be happy, I left not only my job, but my profession, as well. I gave my two weeks notice and quit. I didn't have a job lined up. I didn't even have a permanent home. What I did have was the confidence that I would eventually find something that made me happy. Something that inspired me. Although I am not there yet, I am definitely on the right path. So, this brings me to the question, did I devote almost three years of my post college life to a career I have no interest in, for a reason? Honestly, that's a tough call. Yes, my experiences in my former career taught me a lot. It also exposed me to what I don't like. But didn't I already know what I didn't like? Why then, did I go down that path? Should I even be questioning it? I suppose my concern dwells within the notion that either everything happens for a reason, or nothing happens for a reason. I don't think there's segregation in this "concept." So, this brings me to my next question. If I was meant to be a CPA (even for a short lived time), am I meant to cross paths with certain people? I'm not talking about the random person I exchange a smile with in the grocery store. I'm talking about the people who have had an impact on my life. The people I have chosen to open up to, to get to know, and to and share my life with. Does every relationship and/or friendship happen for a reason? Is it fate that I am meant to share my life with x amount of people before I find that one person who is right for me? Furthermore, how do we know when we find that "right" person...Can you ever be sure? Is *anyone* ever sure? How do you know if certain people are planted in your life for good or for just a short period of time? 

I'm not even sure why I burden myself with these questions, especially since I know that I'll never know most of the answers.

I know this is an abrupt halt to a seemingly complex issue, but given the therapeutic benefits writing has on me, this won't be the last time I write about this...With that being said, there will be plenty more to come....


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